


Wall of Shame

by Blacklace



Category: Sabaton (Band)
Genre: Also Idiots in love, Chrobbe, Fluff, I'm Going to Hell, Idiots on tour, M/M, Pär is like their mother basically, Slow Burn, more tags to come
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-18
Updated: 2016-07-10
Packaged: 2018-07-15 19:44:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7236016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blacklace/pseuds/Blacklace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Why are you up by the way?” the blond asked.<br/>“Jocke is snoring like a goddamn rhino again. And I left my ear plugs in the suitcase,” Chris sighed.</p><p>Or the one where tremendous amounts of alcohol lead to something else than just a hangover.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this baby has been sitting in my computer for couple months. I got this idea and as it often goes, I needed to get it out of my system. This is for all the Chrobbe shippers out there.  
> Also, this story by no means should hurt anybody. I love these guys and I just got so many feelings for them - this is just a work of fiction, after all.
> 
> Side note: The rating might change in the future (wink wink).

„Do you realize what time it is?” a rough voice from behind startled Thobbe. He barely managed to contain the surprised yelp, that motherfucker scared him yet _again_.

The blond clutched a hand over his chest where his heartbeat was beating so fast it felt like it would jump out of his ribcage. It took him a good couple of deep breaths to calm down enough to form a reply.

“It’s late, I know,” the blond said when he collected himself, rubbing a hand over his face.

He couldn’t be embarrassed about his jumpiness this late at night. Chris had taken advantage of it way too many times before. Every time that Thobbe thought he was safe and had a moment to himself, Chris startled the fuck out of him. There was no point in pretending that this time was any different.

“Are you working on something?” Chris stepped further into the small living area.

“No, not really,” Thobbe shook his head.

“Mmmh,” the other guitarist hummed in reply. Thobbe tore his eyes away from the windshield and watched as Chris laid himself across the free sofa and took up all the space.

“Why are _you_ up by the way?” the blond asked.

“Jocke is snoring like a goddamn rhino again. And I left my ear plugs in the suitcase,” Chris sighed.

Thobbe laughed at his friend’s misery, which earned him a playful punch on the shoulder. Indeed, even he could her their singer snoring faintly all the way up to the front of the bus.

“It’s not funny!” Chris pouted and folded his arms over his chest like a two-year-old.

“Yeah and you surely don’t snore when you’re drunk, huh?” Thobbe mocked him.

“Come on, that’s different!”

“Well, not when I sleep right next to you,” Thobbe chuckled.

He lost the track of how many times they ended up sleeping next to each other. Whether they were drunk or just bored, it didn’t matter. It was always the two of them being the butt of all the gay jokes in the band. They even had a nice gallery of pictures snapped by their friends and mostly by Pär, because that man had a secret talent for sneaking. It was all pictures of them either drunk or in very questionable situations. Pär just _knew_ when to walk in on them.

Like that one time Chris got his hair stuck in the zipper of Thobbe’s jacket by a total accident. It looked like he was about to go down on Thobbe, with his head bent over his crotch. Of course that nobody wanted to hear their excuse that Chris just waved his hair around at the same time that Thobbe zipped up his jacket. The picture itself was enough of an evidence, still hanging in their studio in Falun. _Fucking wall of shame,_ Thobbe thought.

“So you aren’t working tonight? Why else would you be up?” Chris pushed.

“Beats me,” Thobbe shrugged.

“You know that unless you get me drunk there’s no way I’ll stop bothering you, right?”

“Right.”

“So? I know that Jocke’s snoring doesn’t bother you the least bit,” Christoph tilted his head to the side and watched his friend.

Thobbe was sitting on the sofa closest to the wide windshield and kept his eyes on the dark road ahead. There wasn’t anything interesting happening, save for the far away cities and lone cars they were passing. Thanks to the great German highways the road was smooth, almost ideal for sleep. Well, unless one of your bandmates was throwing a snoring tantrum. But Chris was right, Thobbe didn’t mind, he could fall asleep almost anywhere.

“Guess it’s the adrenalin from the show,” Thobbe blurred.

He wasn’t sure why he even stayed up in the first place. The seat was soft and almost too comfortable for him to get up and get to the bunks. Tiredness was nestled deep in his bones, his muscles pulsed nicely after the show. He was tired, yet the sleep didn’t come to him as easily as it normally would.

“Mmmhmm,” Chris hummed and rested his head on the throw pillow more comfortably. Thobbe was vaguely aware that his friend kept looking at him, he could feel his eyes boring into him the whole time. Chris did that a lot and most of the time he wasn’t even aware he was staring. Thobbe got used to it.

“Are you going to sleep here?” Thobbe asked and looked down at Chris. His eyes were droopy and everything about him screamed sleepy.

“Maybe…” he mumbled. “Unless you’re still up for that hidden bottle of Jack?” he grinned at Thobbe with a mischief in his eyes.

Damn, they shouldn’t be drinking _alone_. That had never ended well.

“Where’s the bottle?” Thobbe heard himself ask. _Fucking hell Englund, you know how it always ends!_

“In the left corner behind you.”

“This place has booze everywhere, hasn’t it?” Thobbe fished out a three-quarters full bottle end opened it up to take a swig.

“You bet it does,” Chris laughed and took the whisky from his hand. Their fingers brushed on the neck of the bottle. Chris had quite rough hands from the excessive guitar playing. Yet Thobbe found the touch weirdly pleasing.

The past few weeks were mental when it came to playing shows. When it came to blisters and rough hands, Hannes got it the worst from all of them. He actually had to wear gloves for the last two shows. It was pretty gross, but they’ve all been there at some point, hence the rough hands.

“You act like you gave up on being a Swedish pagan,” Chris shook his head and sat upright. He took a long drink from the bottle, so Thobbe had to take it from his lips.

“Whoa, take it easy!”

“The sooner I get drunk, the sooner I can pass out.”

“Where’s the fun in that?” Thobbe kept the bottle out of Chris’ reach. “I love how you babble when you’re drunk,” he mocked his friend.

“Yeah, you love it when I babble about your pretty eyes, don’t you?” Christoph said somewhat bitterly. “You will never let me live that one down.”

“Nope,” Thobbe laughed. “You were fucking hammered.”

The story was as follows.  

 

> _They got drunk about a week ago, the details were blurred and unimportant to what happened later. The two of them ended up at their shared hotel room, drunk as lords. When Thobbe started taking off his jacket, the world spun with him and he stumbled, knocking both himself and Chris, who happened to be standing behind him, on the bed._
> 
> _Fits of giggles and laughter ensued._
> 
> _When the laughter finally died, Thobbe realized he was trapped under Chris. And his friend just kept staring at him with a blank expression on his face._
> 
> _“What?” the blond asked._
> 
> _“You’ve got central heterochromia!” Chris exclaimed, a little too loudly._
> 
> _“What? What chrome central?” Thobbe asked, dumbfounded._
> 
> _“No, no, you don’t understand! They are so pretty!” Chris mumbled. “It’s like… they are blue on the outer edge and then the inner circle is green with some yellow bleeding right through it,” Chris licked his lips, he did that when he was concentrating. He kept staring right into Thobbe’s eyes, brushing away any stray hair from his face. The touch was so gentle it did weird things to Thobbe’s stomach. He needed to mask it behind something. Like a bit of sarcasm._
> 
> _“You’re making me blush, Rörland,” Thobbe laughed. Everything Chris did was just so funny at the moment._
> 
> _“Shush Englund, I’m not done,” Chris frowned and leaned closer to his friend in order to see better._
> 
> _Even in his drunken state Thobbe was well aware that his pupils were dilated. He was praying that his friend wouldn’t notice any of it. Chris had his face so close to his, body radiating with heat. His own eyes were deep and dark like an abyss Thobbe loved staring into. There was no way he could get away from Chris, even if he wanted to. He was screwed._
> 
> _They had eventually fallen asleep next to each other. And Thobbe kept making fun of Chris for studying his eyes and melting over how pretty they were._

“Whatever,” Chris mumbled and took the bottle from Thobbe to take a swig.

“Come on, Rörland,” Thobbe laughed and stood up to sit down next to his friend. “You’ve got nice eyes yourself.”

“Here it goes again.”

“What? I’m not _that_ drunk, you know that!” Thobbe rolled his eyes.

“We should do something about it then,” Chris brought the bottle to Thobbe’s lips and held his gaze while he poured the liquid into his mouth.

The whisky was strong and they were quickly getting drunk. And as always, it started with a nice buzz. That beautiful feeling when everything is plush and warm and you get so many reasons to get handsy.

“Rörland! Are you trying to get me drunk?” Thobbe giggled. Yup, the alcohol had definitely started to work.

“Me?” he made a shocked face. “Of course I do,” he petted Thobbe’s cheek and made an adorable pout. “I want to get you drunk so I can look into your eyes again.”

“Liar,” Thobbe laughed and shoved at his shoulder. “That’s my job for tonight!” he shuffled closer to Chris and brushed his dark hair away from his eyes. They were a pretty shade of warm brown. He had still some eyeliner left from the last show, being too lazy to fully remove it. The black accentuated the natural darkness of his eyes and Thobbe had a hard time looking away as it was.

“So I can’t look but you can?” Chris turned his head to the side. “Flawless logic there, Thobbe.”

“Shut up, it was you who couldn’t sleep,” Thobbe pointed out.

“Was it now?” Christoph’s voice dropped. He watched the blond with practiced calmness and it wasn’t until then when the blond realized how close their faces were. _So_ close. Thobbe’s eyes momentarily flicked down to Chris’ lips before he could stop himself.

“What do you know, Rörland?” Thobbe slurred and drank from the bottle again, desperately needing to put some distance between them. “Your turn,” he pushed the Jack to his friend. Chris accepted the bottle, but instead of drinking from it, he let it rest by his side.

“You know how you make fun of me for complimenting your eyes?” Chris asked, maybe a little too late.

“Yeah?” Thobbe didn’t know where he was going with that question.

“But I don’t suppose you remember how you made a pass at me?”

“Wait, what?” Thobbe’s breath hitched in his throat.

He was never that drunk around Christoph! It _couldn’t_ be! Sure, there were some blank spaces here and there, but… No, he had never. “You’re kidding, right?” Thobbe said with faked bravery.

“Oh noooo,” Chris laughed and drank from the bottle. There was still some left at the bottom. Thobbe took the Jack from Chris and drowned the rest. He needed to brace himself for whatever it was that Chris was about to tell him.

“Just spill.”

“You were drunk as fuck, I don’t even remember how you got that bad,” Chris started. “And I suppose we ended up like we always do, complaining about relationships and stuff,” he stopped for a while to look down at his hands. The blond had to bite the inside of his cheek to stay still and not run away like a school girl.

“And then you got all cuddly and sweet with me,” Chris trailed and looked up at Thobbe, who was now watching him with wide eyes.

Chris leaned over to the smaller man sitting next to him, placing one hand on his hip and the other on the back of the couch. Thobbe let out a shaky breath and watched Chris’ every movement with wide eyes.

“I thought you were just your usual affectionate self. Everyone knows that you’re a sweetheart when you’re drunk,” Thobbe blushed at these words. It wasn’t his goddamn fault that the alcohol always made him so friendly. “But then you got really handsy,” Chris breathed out and pushed his hand up under Thobbe’s shirt, feeling the warm skin beneath. “…started undressing me,” Chris leaned just a tad closer, so his lips were almost brushing against Thobbe’s cheek. The blond thought he’s going to explode with emotions.

But then Chris started laughing and the moment was gone. The excitement gone, leaving Thobbe feeling vulnerable and awkward.

“Oh God, why didn’t you tell me sooner?” the blond rubbed a hand over his face, groaning in embarrassment.

“Where would be the fun in that? Besides, you were mumbling some girl’s name, so I didn’t think anything of it,” Chris shrugged.

Wait… a girl’s name? Thobbe couldn’t remember the last time he was interested in a woman. Unless it was Scarlett Johansson, of course. Except that _that_ didn’t count.

“Alright, now I’ll have to stop the teasing with you waxing poetry over my eyes, I suppose,” Thobbe resigned.

“I’m sure there’s soon going to be something else,” Chris drew his hands away from Thobbe and flopped back next to him.

It left the blond feeling cold on the places where they were touching just seconds ago.

“You make for the best embarrassing stories, though,” Thobbe tried to make his friend feel better while masking his own mixed emotions.

They did a tremendous amount of silly and downright shameful things together. There wasn’t much they kept from each other. And during moments like these, when he was alone with Chris, Thobbe was grateful that things had worked out for them the way they did. If it wasn’t for Sabaton, he would never come to know Chris. At least not the way he knows him now.

“Don’t even start,” Chris groaned. He threw his head back and rested it on the back of the couch.

“If it makes you feel any better, it wasn’t you whose pants ripped on stage,” Thobbe reminded him. He knew it would send Chris into fits of giggles. And he was right. Chris doubled over with laughter as soon as the words left Thobbe’s mouth.

He wheezed and kept making wild gestures with his hands.

“I fucking told you to put some underwear on!” Chris laughed, now with tiny tears at the corners of his eyes. “There are still people asking me and Pär about it,” he poked his friend in ribs.

“Yeah, Jocke still makes fun of me. Every single time we get dressed,” the blond shook his head somewhat fondly.

Chris was still giggling next to him, even though the laughter was slowly dying.

“You’re enjoying yourself, aren’t you?” Thobbe mocked.

“Sorry, sorry,” Chris raised his arms. “But it was so fucking hilarious. I never imagined you’d get your dick out on stage by accident,” as soon as he said it, he started laughing hysterically again.

“Shhh, you’ll wake everybody up,” Thobbe was laughing too, but he was still vaguely aware that they were loud. So he did the first thing that made sense. He covered Chris’ mouth with his hand. But he kind of forgot that alcohol and balance didn’t go well together and fell on top of his friend. They tumbled down on the floor in mess of limbs and hair and it only served to amuse them further.

So they were lying on top of each other, laughing like little kids. Chris ended up on top of Thobbe, his long hair got all over the blond. They both shielded his vision and tickled his skin. Thobbe put his fingers drunkenly in Chris’ hair to put them away from his face. He gathered his hair in a sloppy pony tail and only then he realized he didn’t have a hair tie on him, so he stuck with holding Chris’ hair in his hand as it was.

The taller man on top of him closed his eyes, his mouth was slightly open. It confused Thobbe. Did he do something wrong? He almost asked out loud, but then Chris opened his eyes.

His pupils were blown so wide they swallowed most of the dark brown of his eyes. They were almost as black as night.

Oh. _Oh._

Thobbe pulled on the hair he was holding just a little, looking for the reaction in Chris. His lips parted a little more and he inhaled sharply. _That kinky bastard_. Thobbe thought it was amusing and he kept playing with Chris’ hair and watched as the man over him melted.

“Thobbe,” he breathed out, eyes half-lidded.

The blond didn’t reply and instead he run the fingers of his free hand over the back of Chris’ head.

“St-stop it, ahh, please,” the guitarist begged. But Thobbe heard the pleasure in his voice and decided otherwise. He tugged on Chris’ hair, which elicited a soft moan from him. “Fuck, you’re m-making me hard,” Chris whined and buried his face in the crook of Thobbe’s neck.

Thobbe took the chance and run his short nails down Chris’ back. The man in his arms shuddered almost violently. He purred next to Thobbe’s ear and it was the right kind of music he wanted to hear.

“It’s just the alcohol making you horny,” Thobbe reasoned and raked his nails all the way up to Chris’ neck.

“I won’t be able to hold myself if you keep this up,” Chris groaned just as Thobbe tangled his fingers back into his hair. He realized that he loved railing Chris up. Testing his limits. Watching him crumble under his touch. It wasn’t the first time he’d done something like that to Chris. There was something hot and forbidden about the whole adventure. The alcohol added just that extra little rush of blood that made it so exciting.

“What are you doing? Are you fighting again?” a stern voice brought them back to reality.

Chris’ whole body jerked at the intrusion and he quickly scrambled to get off of Thobbe.

“N-no, we aren’t fighting!” he stammered.

Thobbe was amused, but decided to play along. Thanks God it was impossible to tell they were blushing from something else than the alcohol and supposed fight.

“It didn’t sound like it,” Pär folded his arm over his chest. “You sure you two are fine?”

“Yeah, we just had a little disagreement about one of the guitar solos,” Thobbe waved his hand in the air.

“Just don’t hurt each other, okay?” Pär’s eyes softened.

“We won’t,” Chris nodded enthusiastically and Thobbe had to bit back a chuckle. They were like two kids caught red handed and being scolded by their parent.

After Pär grabbed a bottle of water he disappeared back to bed and left the two of them alone. When it was safe to talk again, Thobbe turned his head to check on Chris. He looked adorably shocked by the fact that their bassist just walked in on them. _Like it was the first time he’d done such thing,_ Thobbe thought to himself.

“Are you made at me?” Thobbe tried when the silence between them stretched for a while.

“What? No, no I’m not,” Chris sighed and rested his back against the sofa. They were still sitting on the ground where they ended up just minutes ago. “I think I’m gonna hit the hay,” Christoph announced, his voice void and distant.

He rose up from the ground, almost tripping over his feet and falling back down again. He wished Thobbe a good night and zig-zagged to the bunks.

The blond watched him disappear and when he couldn’t see Chris any longer, it finally started dawning on him. His first reaction was to blame it all on the alcohol. It was always like that, wasn’t it? The warm buzz and hands flying in all directions. Alcohol just made it so easy to fool around with people. But Thobbe should know better than get handsy with his best friend.

He got up from the floor and lied down to the couch where Chris was sprawled previously. It was cold, but the material soon warmed up to Thobbe’s body. The world was spinning with him. Whether it was the alcohol or something else, he didn’t care. He put one foot on the floor and touched the nearest wall with his hand. It was said to help with the spinning one experienced after drinking too much. It did little to calm the nauseating feeling in the pit of Thobbe’s stomach, though.

But eventually it led to the guitarist falling asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, another chapter of these two dorks being dorks with each other :3

“Are you sure it’s the right building?” Pär asked with a hint of concern in his voice.

“It has to be. The GPS isn’t showing any other hotels of that name in the area,” the driver replied.

“So it has to be it.”

“I definitely hope so.”

Thobbe listened to the conversation Pär had with their driver and he couldn’t be more amused. He didn’t mind the least bit, it was a nice form of distraction from his playing. He was comfortable playing meaningless melodies on his acoustic guitar, humming along to his heart’s content.

They were currently lost in the streets of the next city they were playing at. Something wrong with booking of their hotel, if Thobbe recalled correctly. They had to switch hotels at the last minute because the one they were supposed to be staying at had an emergency shut down. He stopped listening to Pär at that point, deciding it was too boring for his liking. And if it really was that important, he could always ask Chris.

“Seems like we’ll get two rooms,” Joakim sat across from Thobbe and fiddled with his phone.

“Yeah?” the blond asked without looking up from his guitar.

“One with three beds and one with two.”

“Great.”

“Wanna flip the coin?” Joakim casted a crooked grin at him.

“For what? Who’s gonna end up sleeping with you?” Thobbe looked up and laughed.

“No,” the singer rolled his eyes, but laughed at the joke nevertheless. “One of the rooms has king sized bed. Meaning two of us are going to be a happily married couple for the night.”

“Give that one bed to Chris, he hates how you keep snoring at night,” Thobbe smirked.

Jocke put on a thoughtful face and then lighted up like a Christmas tree. Never a good sign.

“That’s actually a great idea, my friend!” Jocke clasped a hand over his shoulder. “And you should get the other bed, since you’re so kind to him!”

Before Thobbe could say anything to protest, Joakim got up and went to the front of the bus to talk to Pär.

“You, Hannes and I will get the room for three. Thobbe and Chris want to stay together,” he hard their singer say.

“Really? I heard them fight last night,” Pär said with a worried voice. He was so clueless it was adorable.

“All the more reason for them to work it out in privacy,” Jocke looked back over his shoulder, only to see Thobbe flipping him the bird.

 

* * *

 

“So one room? How did we earn it anyway?” Chirs asked as they walked through the hotel corridors. Thobbe was trailing behind him, not really wanting to answer any of the questions. He was well aware that Chris didn’t know their room had a king sized bed. And neither did he know that it was Thobbe’s fault.

“Jocke thought it was funny,” he said vaguely, hoping it would be enough of an answer.

“As long as I don’t have to listen to his awful snoring, I’m okay with it,” Chris shrugged. He stopped abruptly in front of one of the doors and Thobbe almost walked right into him.

“Sorry,” he mumbled and fished out the keys from his pocket. He gave them to Chris, who was closer to the door anyway.

He was sort of ready to hear the shitstorm of complaints once the door was opened. All about how they would have to share a bed and that they were the gay joke again. But to his own surprise, there weren’t any.

“Finally a normal bed!” Chris said, obviously pleased. After he abandoned his suitcase next to the door and got rid of his shoes, he fell face first into the white sheets. “I fucking missed this,” he mumbled into the pillow.

“You make it sound like you haven’t seen a bed your entire life,” Thobbe teased him. But truth be told, his own back ached like a bitch. He wanted nothing more than to sleep in a room with a proper bed instead of the small bunk in their tour bus. Falling asleep on the couch last night wasn’t the smartest decision he has ever made. He still felt the knots in his neck.

“No, you don’t understand!” Chris groaned. “Just try it, this bed is the shit.”

Thobbe shook his head, amused by Chris’ childish behavior. But he still did as he was told and jumped to the bed right next to his friend. He used just enough force to make Chris bounce a little on the other side of the bed. It made them both laugh.

“You were right, it’s soft,” Thobbe admitted, staring into white-painted ceiling. “But I’m afraid that’s not the right solution for my back,” he complained. He hated how old he was getting. The days of reckless sofa sleeping without consequences were long gone.

“Don’t even tell me that you slept on that tiny couch?” Chris asked with disbelief. He had told Thobbe about million times not to sleep there. But it was Thobbe. He loved living on the edge.

“I might’ve passed out in there,” he admitted slowly.

“Seriously, Englund,” Chris shook his head and got up. He kneeled on the bed next to Thobbe and looked down at him like Pär would when Thobbe forgot his guitar strap. “Roll over.”

“What?”

“Roll over, goddamn, before I change my mind.”

Thobbe did as he was told and rolled over onto his stomach. Something about the adamant tone in Chris’ voice sent electricity down his spine. _This should be interesting_ , he thought. The blond made himself comfortable on the bed, patient for whatever it was Chris had in store for him. He soon felt the other man straddle his hips. _So this is how’s it going to be?_

“Help me here, would you?” Chris tugged his shirt up and Thobbe was only happy to help him toss it aside.

The blond soon felt strong arms on his tensed shoulders. He purred under the touch, relishing in the delightful feeling. If there was one thing Chris was better at than playing his stupid seven string guitar, it was back rubs. He knew _how_ to use his fingers. Applying the right amount of pressure where the knots were worst and then soothing the ache out with gentle movements, until it was completely gone. Thobbe was sure that he has melted into the mattress.

“Rörland, du är så jävla bra,” _Rörland, you are so fucking good,_ Thobbe moaned. He didn’t care whether it sounded like they were fucking. He didn’t care for the whole world.

“Det vet jag,” _I know that_ , Chris replied smugly right next to Thobbe’s ear.

He was suddenly so close, his breath warm on Thobbe’s cheek. It felt hot, there were cold shivers running all over his skin and Thobbe had to close his eyes because it was just too much.

On top of it, Chris used his short nails to scratch lightly at Thobbe’s back, making the blond shiver. Thobbe wished Chris would do it harder, make him really feel it.

“I think you’re done,” Chris murmured next to Thobbe, his breath ghosted beautiful over his cheek.

“Nooo,” the blond whined. Chris laughed at his friend and at how desperate he sounded. Thobbe could be insatiable at times. “It still hurts,” he lied.

“Yeah? Where exactly?” Chris sounded a little concerned and Thobbe immediately felt bad for lying like that.

“Here,” he took Chris’ hands and guided them back to his neck.

The taller man sat more comfortably on top of Thobbe’s hips and went back to work. The blond purred contently and let the pleasure spread through his whole body. He might’ve gotten a boner from the way Chris was touching him, but he would never admit it out loud. It was normal anyway, right? Guys got boners from weirder things than their friends giving them massages.

Besides, it just felt _so_ fucking good. Chris’ weight on his hips was grounding, reminding Thobbe where he was and that he couldn’t go anywhere. The strong hands working on the planes of his back anchored him in a way Thobbe didn’t even know they could. It was safe and intimate and not in a weird way. They trusted each other enough to let the other close. Sometimes maybe even closer than they should.

Every good thing has to come to an end, though. And eventually Chris stopped with his ministrations and flopped down next to his friend.

“Thank you,” Thobbe mumbled from the pillow that he had his face stuffed in.

“Now it’s my turn!” Chris said enthusiastically.

“Just give me a minute here, Rörland,” Thobbe chuckled.

He really didn’t need to be straddling Chris with a raging hard on. No, thank you, they were close, but not _that_ close.

“Okay. But don’t you dare to fall asleep like the last time,” Chris warned him. “Or else I’m gonna tickle you until you piss your pants.”

“You wouldn’t,” Thobbe said flatly, even though he was well aware that Chris wouldn’t hesitate to do it at all. In fact. He had done similar thing to him before. Not very pleasant.

“Mmm, try me,” Chris poked him in the side, which made Thobbe squeak like a little girl.

“Okay, okay, point proven,” Thobbe raised his arms up in defence.

When he was sure his body was calm enough, he got up and put his t-shirt back on. Chris watched him with amusement, at which Thobbe rolled his eyes.

“Keep the fat jokes at bay.”

“Wasn’t gonna say anything,” Chris’ smile grew wider. “I was actually going to say I kind of missed the v-necks you used to wear. They look great on you,” his eyes travelled down to Thobbe’s chest.

The blond barely resisted the urge to fold his arms over his chest in a self-conscious manner. The reason he wore his old v-neck was rather simple, really. He had run out of good t-shirts to wear during the tour and he was too lazy to do some shopping. He used to wear v-necks a lot back in the day. Well, back when he had a body he wasn’t ashamed to show off, anyway.

“Shut up,” Thobbe blushed self-consciously when he saw that Chris was still watching him intently.

He shuffled closer to his friends and shoved at his shoulder, which was supposed to insinuate it was finally Chris’ turn for massage. Thobbe hoped that the red blush wasn’t too noticeable on his cheeks. Why was he blushing in the first place? Chris could hardly make him feel uncomfortable. But maybe it was because they spent so much time together that Chris has actually learned all his weak and soft spots.

“Finally, I was dying over here,” Chris laughed.

“And you will keep dying for a little longer,” Thobbe teased him and rolled the black t-shirt up his friend’s back, getting it off of him. “Any specific demands before I begin?”

“Yes. Don’t be gentle,” Chris said like it was just another ordinary request. Thobbe’s breath hitched at these words. They echoed a completely different meaning in his head.

“A-anything else?” he had to shake his head to get the unsuitable imagery out. He couldn’t get a boner now that he was sitting on Chris’ hips.

“Don’t tug on my hair,” he replied with an amused undertone in his voice.

He was clearly referring to the other night. _So he isn’t mad about it_ , Thobbe thought. He even went as far as making a light-hearted joke about it. The blond felt as if a weight was lifted from his shoulders. It was always good to know that what happened between them was fine and didn’t oppose a threat to their friendship. Which meant that Thobbe was allowed to tease his friend back the same way Chris has done to him.

He leaned down and whispered right to his ear as softly as he could.

“What? Are you scared your pants might get too tight?” he mumbled while he pushed Chris’ hair out of his face. He made it a point to run his fingers through the brown locks and tug on the hair just the tiniest bit. It made Christoph hiss and close his eyes.

“Stop it,” he said through gritted teeth. It was far from angry, if you asked Thobbe. It sounded rather breathless to him.

“Sorry, I just want to get your hair into a pony tail,” Thobbe lied. Well, now it was just a half-lie. He needed to get his hair away from his back.

“Tease,” Chris muttered, but let Thobbe to play with his hair nevertheless. The blond found a hair tie and carefully put his friend’s hair in a messy bun. Partly because he loved how Chris bitched when his hair got stuck in the hair tie and partly because he thought that Chris looked cute with it.

When Thobbe first put his hands on Chris’ skin, it was burning hot. The man was like a furnace. Thobbe worried for a split second that his hands were too cold, but when Chris didn’t protest, he thought it was probably okay.

He made sure to get every little of the tensed knots in Chris’ back and applying extra pressure there. He was rewarded with soft groans from the brunet lying underneath him. It was maybe even better than when Thobbe was receiving massage himself. This allowed him to be in control and give pleasure. It was weirdly rewarding.

“You’re good with your hands,” Chris commented.

The remark made Thobbe puff his chest with pride a little. There weren’t that many satisfying things in the world like a good praise. Thobbe made sure to get every spot on his friend’s back and occasionally used his nails to scratch lightly here and there, knowing that it would make the man beneath him shudder and keen for more.

“I hope you’re enjoying yourself,” Thobbe whispered to his ear when he leaned down to check on Chris after what seemed like hours. The brunet was pliant under his arms, making sweet, sweet sounds at every contact. He wanted to leave a small kiss on his shoulder, he was so close. But eventually he thought better of it.

“You bet I’m fucking enjoying myself,” Chris laughed.

It was enough of an answer for Thobbe. He knew that Chris loved his massages, it wasn’t a rocket science, after all. Just simple observation, hearing how Chris gasped and purred under his fingers. He played with him to his best liking, just like he would with his favorite guitar. And Chris seemed to realize it. Yet he didn’t do anything to stop Thobbe in what he was doing. The pleasure was mutual.

“You’re done,” Thobbe announced when he was sufficiently satisfied with his handiwork. He loved turning Chris into a blabbering mess. But why exactly, he wasn’t able to tell.

“Thank you,” Chris mumbled sleepily into the pillow. He stretched like a cat and stayed in put in the same exact position.

“Good night,” Thobbe said mockingly.

“Night.”

Okay, so it wasn’t that funny after all. Chris really wanted to sleep. Thobbe climbed off of his hips and scooped himself to his side of the bed. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to do next. It’d be rude to go play the guitar when his friend wanted to have some rest. And since Thobbe didn’t come up with anything better than that, he decided he could get some sleep as well. They had free afternoon before the show that night. They only needed to do the sound check, which could still wait for couple of hours. Besides, Pär would surely get them and wake them up, if they overslept, so where was the harm in getting a little nap?

But as it turned out, their “little nap” turned into a couple hours of messy sleep. Thobbe didn’t have exactly sweet dreams, but then again – when was the last time that he had gotten any?

The wake-up call wasn’t much nicer either. Pär startled him with his laughter. And while it was impossible to be mad at someone like Pär, Thobbe still hated him for that split second. Especially after he realized that Chris was splayed half on top of him and that Hannes was standing right next to their bassist, phone in one hand and stupid smile plastered all over his face. Fuck, that one was definitely going to Instagram.

“Hate to break your making up process, but it’s time,” Pär giggled.

“Yeah, yeah,” Thobbe muttered, still a little grumpy from his sleep. He poked Chris and tried to get the taller man off of him with no success.

“Aww, look at them,” Hannes snapped another picture.

“Fuck you,” Thobbe bit back.

It only served to amuse the rest of them, especially now that Jocke was present as well.

“The fuck did you give him?” he laughed. If his thunder-like laughter wouldn’t wake Chris up, then nothing could.

“Chris, wake up goddammit, we have a sound check!” the blond tried again.

“Mmm, not yet,” the guitarist mumbled and buried his face into Thobbe’s neck.

Great, now everybody was dying laughing. They will never hear the end of it. But luckily the laughter was finally enough to wake the brunet up. He opened up his eyes and looked around in confusion. When he noticed he was partly on top of annoyed Thobbe, his lips made a cheeky grin and he winked at his friend.

“Thobbe, you really wore me out, man,” he joked.

“Sounds like you had fun,” Jocke poked.

The joke was in place, since Chris didn’t put his t-shirt back on after Thobbe gave him the massage. It had to look all kinds of weird, even more so when there was no excuse for alcohol intoxication.

“Now get your asses off the bed, we have stuff to do,” their singer announced and with these words he went out the door.

“Right, stuff to do,” Thobbe mumbled and after Chris rolled away, he got up.

The ride to the venue wasn’t long and when they came on stage, everything was ready. They made sure their instruments were in sync and that nothing was louder than it had to be. There were some troubles with the bass drums, but when there were not, really. The sound check was done rather quickly, they all knew the routine by heart. Thobbe couldn’t wait until they’d finally play on the stage again.

It was addicting in a good way. He got to play the best music in front of hundreds and thousands of people. He got to make fun of Jocke and play Swedish Pagans. While life on the road might be hard for some, it was a blessing for Thobbe.

“Have you seen my pants?” Hannes asked when they were back in their dressing room.

“Nope,” Pär shook his head.

They were slowly getting ready for their show, putting on their stage clothes and making last adjustments. The smell of their camo pants and shirts was getting progressively worse with every show they played. It was about time they did the laundry.

“Get up, Thobbe, you gotta be sitting on my pants,” the drummer pushed him out of the chair. “Every time I miss something, you’re sitting on it,” Hannes prodded the blond until Thobbe finally gave up. “See? I told you. My pants,” he kept pointing at the scrunched pants Thobbe had been sitting on.

“I could swear that you put them under me while I was sitting,” Thobbe joked, which earned him a light smack from Hannes.

“As if, motherfucker,” he laughed and put on his ratty camo pants. “Alright, see you on the flip side!” Hannes shouted and run towards the stage.

The show went as great as it always did. Until everybody had gone from the stage, except for Chris and Thobbe, as a part of their show. Thobbe drank half a cup of beer for the crowd, he liked this part very much.

“Chris is asking me, what’s my plan…” Thobbe casted a sideways glance at his friend. They had this part where they goofed around on the stage. Their latest joke was to play The Wind of Change.

“I’m in the mood for something softer,” Thobbe said to the crowd. “You know I’m getting old. I’m turning 65,” he joked and watched as Chris laughed next to him.  “So how about something softer?”

He played the first couple of notes with a smile. “You probably know this one,” he started playing The Wind of Change. The crowd cheered and Chris soon caught on with the plan.

People were singing and glowing and it was the true rock’n’roll atmosphere that Thobbe remembered from the 80’s bands. While he was singing the lyrics, he purposely left out the part of the song where it talked about people becoming close like brothers. Not that he didn’t like it, but it was too sensitive and unfitting for his liking.

Besides, the main purpose of playing this little cover was to continue with To Hell and Back, because it had sort of a whistling in it, too.

There was one thing Thobbe couldn’t get out of his head, though. 

> “Are you with me on this one?”
> 
> “Yeah!” Chris replied enthusiastically.
> 
> “One, two, three,” Thobbe counted and then started playing together with Chris the beginning of the well-known song.
> 
> _“Take me,_  
>  _To the magic of the moment_  
>  _On a glory night.”_
> 
> He kept looking towards Chris for the first few moments of the song. The blond wanted to convince himself it was for the sake of the song, so they could be in sync. But what did that have to do with Thobbe staring into his eyes? He couldn’t help it.

It was the look Chris gave him when they were playing that stupid song. Just the two of them. He barely caught it as they were each on their respective side of the stage. But Thobbe could swear that Chris’ look was just as soft as his own at that moment.

There were things unspoken mirroring between them.

Thobbe shook it off as a _heat of the moment_ kind of thing.

He had to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Wind of Change actually happened (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_NGFAFAbYkA) even with that little glance Thobbe threw towards Chris. I love that song so much, every time I hear it my mind automatically goes towards these two <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are getting complicated in the band... like they would ever be easy!

“Everything hurts,” Thobbe complained when he and Chris made it to their shared hotel room.

“How come?”

“Remember how I fell up there?”

Chris began to laugh and it was unstoppable.

“Oh, fuck you!” Thobbe rolled his eyes.

“How did you even managed to do that?” Chris wheezed.

“I don’t know, I just got really excited from the music and the crowd. And then I lost my balance.”

Yeah, it had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that he was watching Chris flipping his hair back and forth and it caused him to be a little motion-sick. For his own defense, though, Thobbe had no idea that it was possible to get something like motion sickness from watching a moving object.

“Alright. Go in the shower first, then,” Chris smirked at him. It was obvious he was resisting to add something more sarcastic to it.

On its own, it wasn’t actually that bad of an offer, considering how often they fought about who’s going to use the shower first. They were both tired which meant the faster they could get it over with, the better. They had already taken a quick shower after the concert, but since they agreed to go to a bar afterwards, there wasn’t time to wash their hair.

They were absolutely gross and smelled like sweat and cigarettes. Thobbe hated washing his hair. But at least his weren’t as long and thick as Chris’.

“Don’t you wanna go first?” he asked, surprised that the words left his mouth.

“What?”

“You always complain about how long it takes for your hair to dry,” Thobbe offered.

Chris seemed to weight the options he had. Then his face lit up and he shook his head.

“Nah, go ahead, I got something to do anyway.”

Thobbe didn’t ask what it was, he probably wasn’t even curious about it. He grabbed a clean change of clothes and disappeared into the bathroom. He might as well take the advantage of his previous embarrassment on stage. They took turns in the cramped bathroom space, poking fun at each other. Who cared if they were more naked than not.

As they lied in the darkness next to each other, Thobbe heard Chris shuffling in the sheets, flailing until he found that one comfortable position. He purred like a cat with the most pleased sigh.

“It’s awesome when there isn’t a giant snoring bear,” he mumbled.

“Mmhmm,” Thobbe replied. He was almost asleep, limbs too heavy and eyes wary from the day.

He had to doze off at that point. It just felt so good to fall asleep with that little remaining buzz of alcohol and total exhaustion from the show circling in his veins. There was something incredibly satisfying about it. More so when Thobbe knew he’d be sleeping next to his best friend and not Pär who kicked people in his sleep. Tiny little bastard. For his size, he took up the most space of all of them.

The annoying melody from Pain’s _Shut Your Mouth_ set the room in a virtual chaos.

“Fucking already with that thing!” Thobbe groaned from his sleep. He had already told Chris several times to change that god awful alarm ringtone to something more human.

“Mmmphh,” Chris mumbled, not affected the least bit by the high tones of synthetic keyboard.

“Rörland, wake the fuck up and shut that thing off!” Thobbe cussed. But all the blood in his veins stopped when he felt a pair of hot lips on his shoulder.

“Go back to sleep,” Chris whispered against his skin. He was so unaffected by the alarm it was ridiculous.

“Get your ass up and turn off your phone,” Thobbe tried to nudge Chris into a full-awareness again.

“What phone?” he groaned. He had to be messing with Thobbe, the melody was so fucking loud by then that there was no way he wasn’t hearing it.

“I hate you so much,” Thobbe rolled his eyes and got up himself to search for Chris’ phone.

He finally turned the “Shut Your Mouth” melody off after what seemed like eternity. He threw the phone onto the pile of clothing sitting on the chair and crawled back into the warm sheets.

“There you go,” Chris laughed.

“I can’t believe you made me do it again,” Thobbe shook his head.

“I have my ways around you,” the brunet purred and threw his arm around Thobbe’s waist. He drew the blond closer, so he was almost cuddling him.

Thobbe noticed how sleepy and soft Chris was. It wasn’t unusual for them to wake up close to each other, but this was still a little bit different. Thobbe was well aware of the proximity and body heat. He was tensed. And Chris’ husky voice didn’t help much.

“What are you thinking? I can hear you complaining all the way up here,” Chris groaned and tightened his hand around Thobbe’s waist.

The blond forced himself to relax next to his friend. It was nothing. They used to get a little handsy with each other on tours. It was something they never really spoke about because in their book it was simple like that. They got starved for affection just like the next person. And faceless sex didn’t quite cut it.

“Nothing, your goddamn alarm clock pissed me off,” Thobbe joked. It seemed to be enough of an explanation for his friend, who only laughed softly before he fell asleep again.

The blond sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. He didn’t feel like falling asleep again. It was bright outside and the stupid alarm had shaken him enough out of the dreamland. He waited couple minutes until he was sure that Chris was out cold and then wriggled out from underneath his arm, stuffing a pillow in his place. Chris hugged the pillow close to his chest like a little kid. It was endearing, but Thobbe had better things to do. Like going to get some breakfast.

To his surprise, the only other member of their band awake was Pär. He was enjoying his breakfast alone with his notebook opened nearby. It was a common sight. Because when wasn’t Pär near his notebook, really.

“Slept well?” Pär asked him without looking up. He seemed rather consumed in the work he had currently laid in front of him. Thobbe shook his head with amusement and sat down at the table, opposite of his friend. He often thought if Pär loved his work more than he did girls. It would explain why he hadn’t seen him around with many women before.

“Yeah, the bed was great. Thanks for setting that up,” Thobbe replied and sipped from the deliciously hot cup of coffee.

“Thought you’d enjoy it,” he looked up with something in his eyes that Thobbe couldn’t quite place. “So no fighting last night?” Pär asked once he looked back down to his notebook.

“Huh?”

“I asked if you had fought again,” Pär smiled at him.

“No, no, we hadn’t,” Thobbe shook his head quickly. “Like I said, it was fine.”

The smaller man was watching him with amusement, but didn’t say anything else. Thobbe felt as though Pär knew something he didn’t and it annoyed him.

* * *

“Chris, have you seen my black t-shirt?” Thobbe has been rummaging through his suitcase and pretty much the whole hotel room for the past five minutes. They were packing their things again, it was time to leave. But that damn shirt, where was it again?

The brunet seemed to be endlessly amused by his friend.

“Which one?” Chris played dumb.

“That v-neck you kept drooling all over the other day?” he reminded him.

“Oh, you mean this one?” Thobbe turned around and his jaw almost hit the floor.

Chris was wearing his fucking t-shirt. And he was damn smug about it, too. _Bastard._

“Now, how did that get there?” Thobbe tutted and stepped closer to Chris.

“Beats me,” the other man shrugged. He was so nonchalant about the whole thing that it was ridiculous. Thobbe resisted the urge to laugh out loud and instead decided to play along.

“So you have absolutely no idea how my shirt ended up on you?”

“I guess the shirt just likes me better,” Chris shrugged.

“Bullshit. You like to steal my clothes.”

“And if I do?”

Thobbe laughed and walked up to Chris. They were standing just couple inches away from each other.

“Then I have no other option than to take it back from you,” he looked Chris up and down.

“Try me, Englund,” Chris folded up his arms in challenge.

Without any other word, Thobbe went straight for the tactics he thought would be the most efficient. Physical intimidation, worked all the time with Chris.

Thobbe stepped just a tad closer to Chris, so their chests were nearly touching. Chris, baffled by what the hell was Thobbe doing, unfolded his arms. He was expecting all sorts of things, mostly physical assault of any kind.

But Thobbe was one step ahead at this game.

The blond sneaked his fingers under the hem of the stolen shirt Chris was wearing. He was looking up to catch the reaction on his face. Thobbe made the movement slow, giving his friend a chance to back off. When Chris stood still, Thobbe dragged his short nails over the exposed skin he could reach. Chris shivered and soon after his skin was littered with goosebumps.

Thobbe smiled, satisfied with the effect it had on his friend. He squeezed Chris’ hips in his hands, they fit so nicely in the palms of his hands.

“How about you just give up?” the blond purred.

They were standing so close. Their body heat mingled with their scents, it almost make their heads spin. Thobbe always liked the way Chris’ hair smelled. The scent was sweet and rough at the same time and this close it was almost overwhelming.

“You know, Thobbe… this is not how you’ll get your shirt back,” Chris laughed quietly.

His voice was low as if he didn’t want to break the pleasantly tense atmosphere between them. Chris decided to play along and sneaked his own hands under Thobbe’s t-shirt, scraping his nails up and down the planes of his back.

A cold shiver run down Thobbe’s spine. It forced him to close his eyes momentarily. The pleasure washed over him and struck him like a lighting. He had to bite down on the inside of his cheek in order to stifle the moan that was threatening to escape his lips. He should’ve thought better of his tactics.

This wasn’t working out the way he planned.

“Wanna bet I can get you out of your shirt first?” Chris whispered next to his ear. The hot air caressed Thobbe’s cheek and he wanted to give up right there and then. Suddenly he understood what Chris probably felt like when Thobbe was tugging on his hair. Why he always begged him to stop. Why his moans were so _wounded_ every time he got close…

“What if I win?” Thobbe asked. His own voice sounded strangely out of breath.

The laughter that came in response was a low rumble. “You get your shirt back.”

“Isn’t it too little to win?”

“Seeing how much you want your shirt back? I don’t think so,” he winked at his friend.

“And the loser?” Thobbe flicked his eyes over Christoffer’s face.

He knew Chris would play dirty. He liked the feeling of victory over Thobbe and the blond was more than happy to give it to him. Most of the time, anyway.

His question about the loser, however, remained unanswered.

Chris trailed his hands down Thobbe’s body. Over his ass and then further down to the back of his thighs where he squeezed firmly.

Thobbe’s breath hitched in his throat.

He was hot all over. Then Chris hauled him up, so the blond had to wrap his legs around his waist. His arms found their way around Chris’s neck, searching for something to keep him stable. Thobbe wanted to protest, but when he looked down at Chris and saw the determination in his eyes, he shut up.

His eyes were dark, almost black as a night and full of unspoken promises that left Thobbe wandering.

He was turned on.

Whatever Chris decided to do to him, Thobbe wanted it. He didn’t care they were friends. He didn’t care for the whole world. His own skin felt too tight, he craved human touch.

Chris walked over to their bed and threw the blond on it. He did it with such strength that when Thobbe made contact with the cold sheets, he let out a soft moan. Chris was dominant and Thobbe wanted him to take what he wanted.

Wanted to comply to whatever order he’d get from the brunet.  

Thobbe laid still and watched as Chris crawled over him and straddled his hips. There was no way he didn’t feel how excited the blond was about the whole thing. Thobbe felt embarrassed. His cheeks were burning red. But he didn’t find the strength in him to fight back. He was too weak against his own greed.

Chris outplayed him once again.

The brunet leaned down, one hand resting next to Thobbe’s head, supporting his weight. The other found its way under the soft cotton of Thobbe’s shirt. The material was dragged up with the movement and Thobbe barely registered it.

“Just admit it that you’ve lost already,” Chris breathed out a laugh.

“No.”

The blond wanted to get his hands on Chris and try to get him out of the shirt. One last attempt to save his dignity. But the brunet was faster and caught his hands. He tutted at him and took both Thobbe’s wrists in one hand, placing them above his head and pressing them down into the soft mattress with more force than was necessary.

Thobbe’s eyes closed with the sudden restraint. The slight pain only added to his arousal and he could barely contain the gasp. He could try to wrestle Chris, but at this point… Thobbe didn’t want to. It felt _too_ good.

“You are making this hard for yourself,” Chris muttered, his voice thick and sweet as honey.

Thobbe’s mind was filling with the dirtiest thoughts possible.

 

> _Chris whispering and talking to him in that deep voice while he keeps him restrained. Then having his way with him, using a belt instead of his hand to keep his wrists above his head. Making Thobbe beg for it and then taking his sweet time taking him apart. Using him to his own liking._

Thobbe needed all of it. He was getting crazy with lust.

The brunet sneaked his hand that was resting on Thobbe’s stomach higher up, feeling up his burning skin. At this point Thobbe was sure he had no dignity left. He stared into Chris’ eyes. His pupils were blown wide and both their breathing was labored and ragged. Chris pushed his hand a little further, the tip of his fingers brushed over Thobbe’s left nipple and the blond straight out moaned under the touch.

He saw that Chris’ mouth fell slightly open, like he was taken aback by the effect he had on Thobbe.

The blond wanted to give up. Just tell Chris to finish whatever it was he was after. Thobbe wanted to save himself the embarrassment of moaning out loud under Chris’ touches again.

Chris leaned down to Thobbe, he was so close that the blond could taste his breath on his lips.

Then someone in the room spoke up.

“I hate to interrupt whatever the hell you’re doing, but we’re leaving in ten minutes,” it was Jocke. The snickering was loud and clear in his voice and Thobbe wanted the floor to swallow him.

“Right, we’re on it,” Christoph answered and let go of Thobbe. He turned around to face Jocke, but didn’t do anything to get up from Thobbe’s hips. The pressure it created on Thobbe’s strained erection was delightful.

The blond rubbed a hand over his face to stop himself from groaning out loud.

“Whatever you’re on, it doesn’t look like leaving,” Jocke laughed. “Actually, it looks more like Thobbe to me.”

“Smartass,” Chris shot back and got off of Thobbe.

The blond quickly sat up and tried his best to mask the awkward boner he was sporting.

After their singer left, they both packed their things wordlessly in the speed of light. There wasn’t time for talking and even less for thinking. They were out of the room in seven minutes, which was probably their new personal record.

Once they boarded and the tour bus came to life, Thobbe found his safe spot by the windshield on the upper floor. It was his favorite place to hide, even if it had absolutely no privacy whatsoever. He could see the road ahead and even inside of the bus, which made it a perfect strategical point. His inner cat was purring with joy.

He made himself comfortable and reached for the acoustic guitar that was sitting in the corner. They would play a lot of guitar on the road. Didn’t matter whether it was for fun during their parties or just because they wanted to occupy themselves with something useful.

Thobbe tuned the guitar and started absently playing some melody. He wanted to take his mind off of what just happened between him and Chris. It was confusing. On one hand Thobbe wanted it. The force of his own lust had taken him aback. It would be nice if he could just chalk it up to booze or touch deprivation or to whatever else sorry excuse he could think of. But Thobbe had none.

It was _him_.

Chris made him hot all over, made him hard and then left him desperate for more.  It was all fun and games while they were drunk, but now it was a whole different story. Thobbe realized, nice and clear, that he wanted all of it. Chris knew how to play him. How to touch him, how to make him blush.

Sure, maybe it was just their usual teasing that had gotten out of hand and Thobbe was simply reading too much into it. It wouldn’t be the first time that Thobbe had seen more in a situation than he was supposed to.

What frightened him, though, was how fast their friendly teasing grew over his head and became something entirely else.

He liked teasing Chris to the point where annoying him wasn’t the main goal anymore. Thobbe suddenly realized it was no longer for the shit and giggles. He wanted Chris to moan _for_ him. He wanted for the brunet to melt under his hands and to lose control over his actions.

To give up into the primal need.

A nagging voice corrupted his thoughts.

 _“Sad are memories from the life I lived…_  
_Cannot go on, cannot go further  
_ _It has to end right here,”_

Thobbe shook his head when he realized that it was Jocke sitting next to him and singing to the tune he was playing absently.

“Go on, I like your playing,” Jocke laughed.

The blond took a moment to remember what exactly it was that he played… _Yes, The Hammer has Falen._ He continued with the melody, much to Jocke’s delight. Thobbe didn’t mind that he sang along. It gave him something he could concentrate on, something he could follow. Anything was better than his own thoughts at the moment.

But even the song had to end at some point.

Thobbe tried to play something else to take his mind away from that nagging picture of Chris kneeling above him with a hungry look in his eyes. Unfortunately, Jocke was in the mood for talking.

“What was it anyway between you and Chris?” he asked.

“A bet,” Thobbe replied without missing a beat.

“You won a blowjob or what?” Joakim started laughing like a rolling thunder, proud of his joke.

Thobbe blushed. He quickly turned his head away to take a sip of water that he conveniently left nearby.

“Well, even if I did, I couldn’t have gotten any because of you,” Thobbe shot right back. The only way to mask what actually happened was to joke about it. Jocke would think he’s just playing along and wouldn’t make much of it.

“And here I was thinking that you already knew I’m the best at giving blowjobs in this band,” Jocke shook his head, disappointed.

The blond doubled over with laughter.

The last time Jocke demonstrated his lack of gag reflex, Chris got the most awkward boner in front of the whole band. Thobbe loved to tease him about it. And apparently, Jocke was somewhat proud that he managed to make Chris hard with his joke.

They didn’t make a huge deal out of it, though. Since they were just a bunch of ordinary guys, they all knew that boners happened. No need to make it weird.

“What’s so funny here?” Pär joined their conversation and sat opposite of them on the free couch.

“Nothing. Just a casual blowjob talk,” Jocke shrugged.

“Should’ve known better,” Pär stood right up with a dramatic sigh.

“Stop scaring him,” Thobbe shoved lightly at Jocke.

Pär put his arms on his hips. “He’s not scaring me.”

He always reminded Thobbe of his mother when he hovered over them like that. Pär might have been the smallest of them, but that didn’t mean he was without any respect. Quite the opposite. They all kind of feared him.

“Besides, Jocke is not as good in blowjobs as he thinks he is. Talent isn’t everything,” he said and without other word walked out.

The first thing that came to Thobbe’s mind was obvious: “You sucked Pär off?”

His voice was pitched so high he didn’t recognize it at first. Their singer pretended like he wasn’t even there.

“Jocke! Answer!”

He couldn’t believe that him and Pär… _No, no, no. Don’t picture it, don’t picture it!_

 _God damn!_ Great, now that mental picture was burned into his head forever. “Did you two really…?”

“Jesus, it was just once, okay!” Jocke cracked. “We were really fucking drunk and he kept making fun of me and… shit happens!” he flailed his hands everywhere in frustration.

“Whoa, take it easy, man,” Thobbe raised his hands in defense. “Even if you did it for fun, it’s none of my business,” he told his friend in all honesty.

They fell into a silence that sat on their shoulders heavily like a burden.

Thobbe couldn’t help it. “Although now I’m kind of tempted to ask you for a blowjob, so I ha-“

“You fucker,” Jocke cut him off and threw a pillow at him. He was laughing again, which meant that everything was fine.

They fought with pillows for a good while, throwing light-hearted insults at each other. They were acting like kids and it was only good that Pär has left, because he’d be scolding them by now.

“Look at you two. Getting friendly, aren’t we?” it was Chris who decided to join their loud corner. He was probably too curious for his own good.

“Jocke is giving out free blowjobs to band members. And he didn’t give me my free coupon!” Thobbe yelled, just as Jocke pressed a pillow against his face.

“Hey, I didn’t get mine either! What the fuck Jocke?”

“I hate you two!” their singer laughed and stood up, throwing one last pillow at Chris. “You two talk out whatever it is you need to, I’m out to make sure Pär never speaks up again.”

He disappeared and Chris threw a puzzled look at Thobbe. The blond had a weird, fluttering feeling in his stomach. All of sudden he felt very self-conscious. There was a proverbial giant elephant in the room, but neither wanted to address it.

Chris had noticed the shift too. It wasn’t just about friendly teasing and pranking anymore.

The brunet was the first one to cave in and speak up.

“Why would Jocke want to shut Pär up anyway?” he asked.

It was good, this topic was safe. Thobbe could do safe. He straightened back up and put on a flashy smile.

“You’ll want to hear this,” he laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shut Your Mouth makes for the best alarm clock, trust me.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know your thoughts :3  
> Kudos and comments are very much welcome, they keep me going! <3
> 
> You can talk to me [here](https://tangercookie.tumblr.com/), if you want! ;)


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